Mexico, 2010: The Obama Telegram
The year was 1917. Germany, France and England were stalemated in the trenches of World War I. Casualties on both sides were horrific. But the carnage wasn’t limited to Flanders Fields where the Germans summarily executed Nurse Edith Cavell and rounded up entire Belgian villages to feed their firing squads. German U-boats killed thousands of men, women and children by sinking, among others, the passenger ships: Lusitania, Housatonic and California. President Woodrow Wilson (D) kept apologizing to Germany. No. Wait. Wrong President.
To break the stalemate, Germany decided to sink even more ships. But, if Wilson responded by getting the U.S. Congress to declare war, Germany needed to divert America’s attention and war supplies to a second front in Mexico. If Mexico would invade the U.S., and help Germany defeat England and France, the victorious Germans would award Arizona, New Mexico and Texas to Mexico
German foreign minister, Arthur Zimmermann, sent a coded telegram to the German ambassador in Mexico, instructing him to offer Arizona, Mexico and Texas to Mexico in return for a Mexican invasion of the United States. But British intelligence intercepted The Zimmermann Telegram and showed it to Wilson. In 1917, an invasion of America’s southern border was unthinkable. President Wilson got Congress to declare war on Germany.
Now, the year is 2010.The understaffed U.S. Border Patrol is in the trenches with the Mexican drug cartels, with the Coyotes smuggling in kids to work in U.S. brothels, and smuggling in poor, illegal aliens seeking U.S. jobs. It is a stalemate. State treasuries are being drained by the costs of law enforcement and welfare. Hospital emergency rooms are overwhelmed delivering Hispanic babies and treating gunshot wounds. Each day, some innocent person is kidnapped in Phoenix.
But wait. The Obamessiahs have Plan A and Plan B. Plan A is to drive down the U.S. economy to the point no one wants to come here. Plan A, however, takes time. Plan B, The Obama Telegram, is quicker:
The Obama Telegram, saying the U.S. plans to give Arizona, New Mexico and Texas to Mexico, is sent to the American ambassador in Mexico, using an easy-to-break code.
Mexican intelligence breaks the code and shows The Obama Telegram to the President of Mexico. He is outraged. Having just exported his most pressing social and economic problems into Arizona, New Mexico and Texas, there is no way Mexico is taking them back.
Mexico declares war on the United States. Mexico invades Arizona and New Mexico. (You don’t mess with Texas.) Caught off-guard, the understaffed U.S. Border Patrol is overwhelmed. Joyous people waving sombreros cheer the Mexican Army all the way to Phoenix. Not clued in on Plan B, an illegal alien mistakenly kidnaps the Mexican commander.
Finally, U.S. troops arrive from Afghanistan and Iraq. The Mexican Army begins a well-planned retreat that leaves U.S. forces in occupation of the northern Mexican States of Sonora, Chihuahua and Coahuila.
Appalled by the Mexican government’s neglect of its people, the Obama Administration recreates the Marshall Plan that rebuilt the defeated Germany of World War II. After a few years of massive, taxpayer-funded aid from the United States, northern Mexico becomes an economic miracle -- just like post-war Germany.
Mexico’s economy becomes so strong not even the poorest peon wants to be an illegal alien in the USA. The U.N. orders Obama to return Sonora, Chihuahua and Coahuila to Mexico.
Thus, Plan A and Plan B worked together to solve everyone’s problems. Well, except for the devastation to Arizona and New Mexico and to the families who lost loved ones due to Plan B.
The Mexican and American Presidents share the Nobel Peace Prize. ACORN figures out a way for the people of Sonora, Chihuahua and Coahuila to vote for Obama. Even Michelle is proud.
Syndicated columnist, William Hamilton, a Distinguished Graduate of the U.S. Naval War College, earned a M.A. in International Affairs from The George Washington University, a Ph.D. in History from Nebraska, and is a graduate of Harvard’s JFK School of Government.
©2010. William Hamilton.